What I learned from my brother's death

My brother Tom died last Friday. He was 76, six years my senior. He lost his battle with pneumonia and a weak heart. His life made me think of two famous movies. The first was It's a Wonderful Life. He didn't have a wonderful life. His was filled with disappointments, heartache and two terrible family lives. When we lived together the walls would shake with the altercations between Tom and my father. My mother often received the brunt of the scuffles trying to separate them. When he married and had two daughters not much improved or changed. Later in his life with his second wife he became the textbook husband. His sole purpose in life was to care for her. Ultimately sacrificing his own well being for hers. Unlike George in the movie, in his hour of need his friends didn't all come out to help and see him through the tough time. They instead left him alone, hooked to machines to keep him alive. In the end he died next to the person who cared for him the most, his daughter.
   The  movie Ghost came to mind when I thought of the scene when Patrick Swayze's killer meets his demise. These black spirits come from down under to carry him away. These spirits also came when Tom died. These were the spirits who left him alone. These were the spirits who only had their own self interests in mind.
      Tom and I were never that close. The age difference and all the peripheral problems put a wedge between us. When Tom moved to Florida we kept in touch and visited occasionally. I was supposed to visit him on the Sunday I saw him in the hospital. In spite of all the history between us I knew the place to be was with him because no one should be alone at times like this. His daughter Gina was also there with her Dad and I know he knew it.
  What have I learned from my brother, Tom. Bad times do bring out the worst in people. Of course, these people were already at the bottom of society.